Ingenious and ingenuous: the crutchpade

1. crutch: a long stick with a crosspiece at the top, used as a support under the armpit by a lame person.
   • [in sing. ] figurative a thing used for support or reassurance : they use the Internet as a crutch for their loneliness. 
2. spade: a tool with a sharp-edged, typically rectangular, metal blade and a long handle, used for digging or cutting earth, sand, turf, etc.
3. Call a spade a spade. 

image from the Archipov collection: will be removed on request